Pisces: From Behind That Locked Door Read online

  Jay wished this could be his job. He would dedicate every waking second to pleasing Stephen, and that would be its own reward. He wouldn't make any money, but he wasn't making any money now and he was really beginning to resent the way school cut into his time with Stephen. Whenever Stephen wanted or needed something, he would only have to ask, until Jay learned all his needs. And then he wouldn't even have to bother with vocalizing his desires, Jay would simply anticipate them. As impractical as the thought was, it refused to dislodge itself from his brain. Jay had no choice but to give in and indulge the fantasy while he moved his mouth in a faster rhythm, sucking harder with each downward stroke.

  "God, your mouth... I can't even... don't stop. Just don't stop," Stephen whispered, each word sending a new shiver down Jay's spine. He'd never heard Stephen quite like this. He always spoke with an easy control, but now his voice was tight and his throat sounded sore. It gave Jay hope that Stephen would at least want a repeat performance. Maybe that evening after they went to the gym? Maybe in the locker room? They could both fit in one of the bathroom stalls. Jay would find a way to make it work if it meant getting his mouth around Stephen's cock again. Or maybe back at Stephen's place? The fact that he had a futon for a bed would make it easier for Jay to escape after Stephen finished, and that way he could prolong this for one more night.

  "Jay... I'm close... you should... you can... stop if you want."

  He was not going to stop. He would take a mouthful of come. But he was not going to stop. He wasn't going to let one second of their time together go to waste. What if Stephen didn't want him to do this again? Then he would probably regret not swallowing his come when he had the chance. He tightened his grip on Stephen's shaft and moved faster. He was rewarded for the extra effort within seconds, Stephen biting the back of his hand while his hips shot forward. The salty liquid flooded his mouth, and it was all Jay could do to force himself to swallow, the temperature and texture both striking him as something quite unpleasant, even though the flavor didn't bother him. He could get used to it, though. If he had to. If Stephen would give him the chance.

  Jay let his mouth linger on Stephen's cock even though his back was starting to ache from his awkward angle. He licked at the skin, cleaning it of the last of the sticky fluid, and tried to compose himself. His groin was so tight that it almost brought tears to eyes. Jay had never in his life suffered from such a case of blue balls. It made Saturday's pain seem like a slightly uncomfortable twinge in comparison. How he was going to walk out of that room and sit at his desk like everything was perfectly normal, he didn't know. It would probably be the hardest thing he'd ever done in his life.

  "I better get out there before anybody misses me," Jay said, straightening.

  "I think you're safe for a few more minutes."

  Jay shook his head. "There's nobody out there to answer the phone."

  "The phone's not ringing."

  "I meant, in case it does."

  Stephen stood and zipped his pants. "I think people might notice if you go out there like that."

  Jay looked down, not surprised to see his pants tented so far in front of him. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had an erection like that. All he wanted to do was unzip his pants and steal a few seconds of relief. His hand unconsciously drifted to his fly, and Stephen's eyes widened slightly. He stilled, dropped his hand again, realized he would have to be a completely different person to do that. Even if the alternative was to deal with a huge, painful boner.

  "It's not too far to my desk," Jay muttered. "I should be okay."

  "Jay... "

  "Yeah?"

  "Are we going to the gym tonight?"

  "I planned on it." He even brought his gym clothes.

  "Good. I might be a little bit late because I have a phone call at four-thirty. Wait for me?"

  "Yeah, no problem."

  "Are you sure you don't want to let me take care of that?" Stephen asked.

  Jay nodded. He appreciated the offer more than Stephen could know. He wished he could just explain to him that he didn't have to worry about it. "I'm sure."

  He checked both ways when he opened the door, relieved to see that the room was mostly empty. He was able to slip over to his desk without attracting any attention, but no amount of adjusting himself beneath the desk could ease the pain in his groin. Jay wondered how many times they could do this before he drove himself insane. At least nobody ever actually died from blue balls, although Jay fully understood why teenage boys believed they might. Anything that hurt like this must be terminal.

  * * * *

  Jay didn't have the chance to blow Stephen at the gym, much to their joint disappointment. The weight room wasn't exactly the chamber of horrors that Jay remembered, especially when it was his turn to spot Stephen and he didn't have to worry about Stephen catching him staring. Given how eager he was to do unspeakable things to Stephen's body, he thought he could deal with Jay openly appreciating his body. And he did appreciate it. A great deal. He couldn't believe that Stephen hadn't been born with that perfect physique.

  When their hour was finally up, Stephen followed him into the locker room, chattering about the best way to lift weights and the different theories about how the human body responded to that sort of exercise. Jay did his best to listen politely, despite his impatience to get out of the damp, itchy sweats. Finally, he had no choice but to leave Stephen in mid-sentence and mid-strip, grabbing his clothes and ducking into what he was beginning to think of as his stall.

  Stephen was waiting for him when he emerged, a thoughtful look on his face. "So if I invite you out to the movies, are you going to tell me you have to read the collected works of Shakespeare by tomorrow morning?"

  Jay grinned. "No. What were you thinking?"

  "I think The Other Guys is still playing at Brewvies. If we had head over there now, it'll probably still be pretty quiet. We could have most of the theater to ourselves."

  Jay had no quibbles with that plan. "We could get dinner there, too. The food isn't great, but it's edible."

  "I know, I spent a lot of time there this summer. I'm sort of in love with their nachos."

  "They're really good, right? It's because they don't skimp on the cheese."

  "Or the guacamole. I hate places that only give you like a tablespoon of the stuff."

  "I'm also a big fan of their fries," Jay admitted. "I'm not sure what they do different. Maybe they take the time to hand cut them."

  "I wish more movie theaters served beer and nachos. I bet more people would go to the movies then."

  "Yeah, if only because people wouldn't bring their kids to an establishment that served booze."

  "Exactly. It's pretty much a win for everybody. You mind driving again?"

  "Not at all."

  Jay would have liked to shower before going on any sort of date--was this a date? Was it? Jay wished he could just ask. They'd already been intimate twice and didn't Stephen imply that their lunch on Saturday was a date? That meant this probably was to. He was going on a date with Stephen McNeil. How could this not be an elaborate practical joke? Somebody must have been waiting in the wings to pull the rug out from under him, because this sort of thing didn't happen to people like him. But it was happening, and he still had the taste of Stephen's come in his mouth to prove it. In that case, he should have insisted on going home first and showering. He was probably more disgusting than usual, and that wasn't the sort of impression he wanted to make on Stephen. He'd have to make more of an effort to keep his distance, even though the distance he already carefully held between them was killing him by inches.

  Even though Brewvies was on the other side of town, it usually didn't take more than ten minutes to get there from the University. Salt Lake wasn't exactly a big city. But they'd managed to hit the worst of the downtown congestion, which worked out in Jay's favor because it gave him an additional fifteen minutes of Stephen's company, which they filled with idle chatter that didn't mean anything and somehow mean
t everything all at once. Until Stephen casually dropped a bomb in his lap.

  "How many boyfriends have you had? Any jealous exes I should know about?"

  Jay laughed. "Jealous exes?"

  "Yeah."

  "Have you been attacked by jealous exes before?"

  "It's been known to happen."

  "Really?"

  "Sure. Everybody has their baggage. Sometimes their baggage happens to be crazy and possessive."

  "I don't have any."

  "Crazy ones?"

  Jay licked his lips and stared at the red light ahead of them. "I mean, I don't have any."

  "Ah."

  Ah? Ah what? Jay thought it was obvious that he'd never had a boyfriend, so why did Stephen have to bring it up at all? Just so Jay would have to say it out loud? He didn't exactly need the reminder that Stephen was probably slumming it. His good mood crashed at that, and he immediately began thinking of ways to get out of the date. He couldn't use homework as an excuse. Maybe he could text Amy and have her call him. Stephen was pretty smart, though. He might be suspicious if Jay's roommate just happened to have an emergency when Jay very clearly wanted to escape.

  "Jay?"

  "What?"

  "It's okay."

  Jay risked glancing over, surprised to see that Stephen was looking at him with obvious concern. "What's okay?"

  "That you haven't had a boyfriend before. If you're upset because I asked, then I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... offend you or anything."

  "I'm not offended. Or upset. Don't worry about it."

  "Okay... but I can see that you are. Whenever I say something you don't like, you clam up and start looking around, like you want an escape route."

  Jay didn't know what to say to that. An outright denial didn't seem like a good strategy, since Stephen probably wouldn't accept it. "I'm not offended. It's just... "

  "What?" Stephen prompted. "Tell me. If you don't, I'll keep putting my foot in my mouth."

  "I just... don't know why you even asked."

  "I don't understand."

  "It seemed like a pretty pointless question, that's all."

  "Why was it a pointless question?"

  Jay sighed. Stephen was really going to make him say it then. Fine. He didn't know what Stephen was playing at, but if he wanted to have this conversation, then Jay would go along with it. "Because you already knew the answer."

  "I didn't already know the answer. That's why I asked."

  Jay snorted. "Yeah, right. Like it's not perfectly obvious. I've never had a boyfriend, Stephen. Or... or anything else."

  "I see."

  "Yeah," Jay muttered as the light turned green. He made a left and pulled into the theater's parking lot, wishing more than ever that he could just go away. Somewhere far away.

  "Jay, I really didn't ask to upset you."

  "Okay. We better hurry, the movie is supposed to start in five minutes."

  "For what it's worth, it wasn't perfectly obvious to me."

  Jay nodded, but the words essentially went in one ear and out the other.

  "I mean it. You're what, twenty-four? Twenty-five? Why wouldn't you have ex-boyfriends?"

  "Okay, Stephen, I get it. It was a perfectly legit question. I answered it. Now let's go inside." Jay's heart thudded painfully.

  "Okay. Let's go inside."

  A dividing wall split the bar into two uneven spaces. To the left was the bar itself, two pool tables, and several tables, to the right was the cash register and concession stand--which had the standard popcorn, Whoppers and seven different types of beer on tap. The Other Guys was playing in the closest of the two theaters, and their plan to beat the crowd was surprisingly effective, since there was nobody else there.

  "One of the couches?" Stephen asked.

  Jay shrugged, not even thinking about the possibility of snuggling on the small, well-worn sofa placed in the back of the theater. He barely noticed when Stephen sat close enough to touch his thigh, thinking it was probably just that the couch was too small for both of them to sit comfortably. Within moments of settling in, the houselights went down and the projector clicked to life just above and behind them. With Stephen's attention on the screen and the darkness settling around them, Jay felt some of his earlier humiliation ease. It was always so easy to see bad intentions in the heat of the moment, even when it made far more sense to give Stephen the benefit of the doubt. Once again Jay wanted to apologize, though he had nothing tangible to apologize for.

  He was too caught up in his own thoughts to pay attention to the movie or to what Stephen was doing. Subsequently, he damned near jumped out of his skin when Stephen's fingers crept over his lap.

  "What are you... " Jay's breath caught in his throat as Stephen tugged at his fly, making it perfectly clear what he was doing. Jay wasn't hard until Stephen had his zipper pulled down. By the time he pushed his hand into Jay's pants, his cock was rigid and straining for attention, jerking in anticipation a split second before Stephen's fingers wrapped around his length.

  "Stephen, what are you doing? You could get us thrown out."

  "Shh, nobody's going to throw us out."

  "But what if somebody walks in? There could be latecomers or... "

  Stephen leaned over, putting his mouth so close to Jay's ear that he could feel the shape of the words on his lips. "I'll stop if you really, really want me to. Tell me you really want me to stop, Jay."

  "I don't... "

  "Doesn't this feel nice?"

  Jay nodded mutely, knowing he didn't need to speak. Stephen's movements were restricted by his Jay's pants, but that didn't stop him from establishing a steady rhythm. He leaned closer and closer until he was half covering Jay's chest, his hard cock pressed to Jay's thigh. Jay naturally reached between their bodies to palm him, but Stephen shifted forward, blocking Jay's hand.

  "No."

  "But... "

  "I know. But just relax."

  Jay couldn't do anything except comply. Stephen's hand was hot and tight, fingers rough and gentle at the same time. And so, so different from Jay's own hand. All of the nights he'd tried to imagine what it would be like to feel another man touch him had just been a waste of time. His fantasies had never come close to this. Every brush of Stephen's fingers was unexpected, every twist of his wrist a new delight. Pre-come covered him, making his flesh slick under Stephen's touch, which only aided his quick, sharp jerks. Jay dropped his head back, all of his earlier tension draining from him, pleasure rushing in to flood the newly hollowed spaces inside of him.

  He bit his hand to muffle his moans, his teeth sinking into the soft flesh at the base of his thumb. Since he couldn't touch Stephen, he didn't know what to do with his hands. Stephen's breath was hot against his ear, heavy and excited, impossibly loud despite the speakers booming around them. The sound of Stephen's arousal almost did more for him than the friction on his cock--and the friction on his cock was the most exquisite sensation he'd ever experienced.

  "God, I wish I could see your cock, it feels so good."

  Jay tensed at that, but Stephen refused to give him an opportunity to dwell on the thought. As much as he may have wanted to, Jay simply couldn't focus on anything besides the twist of Stephen's palm over his crown. He jerked his hips, his thighs and stomach tightening as the tingling at the base of his spine grew more intense.

  "Do you know how much I want you?"

  Jay shook his head, because he didn't know, because it was a lie.

  But...

  But if Stephen didn't want him, why take him to the movies and shove his hand down Jay's pants? And if he didn't want Jay, why would he say it? What if he just took Stephen's word for it?

  "We'll go back to your place after this and I'll show you," Stephen promised. "I'll use my mouth and... "

  That was it. That was all Jay needed to hear. The thought of him using his mouth on any part of his body was too much for him to take. He tried to choke out a warning, but the words wouldn't come fast enough and Stephen didn't a
ppear to care, anyway. He must have sensed the growing tension beneath Jay's skin, and he quickened his pace until everything erupted all at once. Jay couldn't stop himself from crying out, but the sound was lost in a barrage of gunfire. Stephen slowed, but didn't stop, milking Jay's orgasm for as long as he could, until he was just smearing the sticky come over his softening cock.

  "Here," Jay said, handing Stephen his stack of napkins.

  "Thanks." Stephen kissed Jay's neck before taking them from him. The brief press of lips to skin burned him, and even though he was floating on the endorphin rush of his orgasm, it was that small kiss that settled in his chest and radiated warmth like a small, pulsing star.

  "I'm going to go get cleaned up."

  "Okay."

  The bathroom was on the other side of the building and there were more people milling around, queuing up for the other movie, but Jay walked quickly and kept his head down, avoiding making eye contact with anybody before ducking into the bathroom. He cleaned himself and his pants as well as he could, washed his hands, splashed water in his face, and stared at himself in the mirror. If Stephen did want him, he couldn't think of a single reason to explain it. But there were many things Jay didn't understand about the world, that didn't make any of it less true.

  Stephen took him by the hand as soon as he returned and tugged him down to the sofa. When their mouths touched, his lips were a little spicy and sweet from the salsa, and Jay caught a hint of alcohol on his breath. He didn't hesitate to respond, happily following Stephen's lead. They only paused occasionally after that for a breath or a drink. It wasn't long before they were both hard again, but other than grinding against each other, they didn't do anything about that. This, Jay realized as Stephen's tongue slid into his mouth, wasn't about getting off. It was slow and careful, thorough and soft. Introductory almost. As if Stephen wanted to show him everything he couldn't say.